†   The Olive Branch

 

When I met him, he was charming. He knew all the right things to say. I was lonely. I was free. I was smart, in college, building on a career. I was riding the waves of

adulthood. It felt good. Then something happened. I can't explain it. I wanted to get away from him. As much as I knew he wasn't right for me, I couldn't leave. It was like something took over me and I couldn't make the right decisions; one wrong decision after the other. I forgive me...

 

When he took my baby, he took my life. I died that day.  I was left with emptiness and

brokeness. I felt abandoned and rejected. I lost…… I lost myself. I lost a daughter, I wasn't a mom anymore….instantly it was ripped from me… I wasn't a wife or an ex-wife, or a daughter-in-law….. I was barely a daughter since he isolated me from my family. He monitored my entire life….everything except my breath. I hated him for it. I forgive him.....

 

When you helped him hide my daughter from me, I felt betrayed. You blamed me, but he was abusive. I had to leave him or he was going to kill me. I didn't want his hatred and wrath on my daughter. But you let him….helped him keep her from me. I hated you. I was blazing mad. You took my baby, my flesh and blood. You took part of me. I was left empy and bleeding. My spirit was broken. I can't put it into words for anyone to understand. It hurts more than anything in the entire world. I forgive you.....

 

When I made the decisions that I did. When I chose him, I was scared.  I needed security. In some moments he made me feel safe. In other moments his eyes changed, he turned into someone that I didn't know, but I always recognized when he reared his ugly head. He made me question everything I ever believed in. His anger

made me question myself and what I was doing. We had no business getting married…….Forgive me.....

 

 He took everything from me. He took my dignity….made me feel less than human. He kept promising that he would stop. He would get so furious, I didn't let my parents tell me what to do, did he really think I was going to go across the field to get the soccer ball just because he demanded it? Guess he figured that out when he drug me by my hair to get the ball when I refused to retrieve it. That was the least of his nastiness. It wasn't necessary. When the wedding vows, say obey, that's not what they are talking about……but somehow, according to him and you, his family, this was all my fault. Forgive me.....

 

I trusted you. He told me, "Let my family be your family." Not that you were a 

replacement for my family, but I wanted that…. I wanted an extended family, I

wanted to love you, but you wouldn't let me. I was the outsider. I felt that you took my baby from me on purpose, to be mean, to punish me because I couldn't live with your son….. I didn't let him control me. He wasn't the only one who ripped out my heart. You ganged up on me. You kicked me to a pulp and left me for dead. You knocked the life out of me. So I did what I thought was best. But, God closed the door. Forgive me.

 

 

..to be continued......

NEWS

Last Seen:

Bianca or Nina was last seen by her friends at the Yamaha school of music in Monterrey, Neuvo Leon, Mexico in December 2013.

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© Deana Hebert